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dark poetry eating through your brains

WolfLarsen

Member
Composition 5
By Wolf Larsen
Her room was drenched with loneliness
I felt alcohol become the universe
Sound splintered through the audience
Sound became rivers waves oceans through the bar
People were happy for one small moment
Smiles erased the universe
Faces collided with rhythms
And words became prisons while I became so obsessed with words that I live in chaos, I burn with words for my obsessions while neighborhoods become abstract and melt into paint - it’s been years since the sun - it’s been years since the sun - it’s been years since the sun and earth melted into the universe
While black ink drops fall from the white sky, your life is all the tortured objects in a dead lonely room - in your plunging-rising-falling-crashing-room all the compulsive objects hallucinate themselves into soft oozing sculptures and history became an ocean stampeding over the human race
My life became an uncontrollable chaos
I kill all the stars
All the stars in every poem no longer exist
The best way to break inside your head is to paint yourself in a cemetery
Copyright 2004 by Wolf Larsen. All Rights Reserved.

If you would like to read more you may go to:

http://secretwebsites.com/dark_poetry.htm
 
I'm sorry, but I felt no flow in that poem. All I saw was (hey lookie, a palindrome) a rant on lots of different random things.

Sorry I couldn't say any more.
 
The imagery is great, but this poem(?) seems to lack structure, as if it's a a daily poetic blog entry.
 
I can honestly say that this is well up to the standard we have come to expect from WolflArsen.
 
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