Faith

[manuscriptx]

Faith is based on a little white lie, where there's a will there's a way.
Faith is based on a dare, a steep hill, a pigeon's red eye, that green hole pie in the sky.

Faith is based on a secret between little school girls, between boy's locker rooms, and wooden janitor's closets.

Faith is based on a political system of favors and misgivings; one hand washes the other, and ugly dirty skin colors.

Faith is based a system of networks, broken promises killed her, Terri Shaivo's fate.

Faith is based on one's own market value.
Milkshakes turn red, not blood, a mere strawberry.

 

[SevenWritez]

Faith is based on a little white lie, where there's a will there's a way.
Faith is based on a dare, a steep hill, a pigeon's red eye, that green hole pie in the sky.

Faith is based on a secret between little school girls, between boy's locker rooms, and wooden janitor's closets.

Faith is based on a political system of favors and misgivings; one hand washes the other, and ugly dirty skin colors.

Faith is based a system of networks, broken promises killed her, Terri Shaivo's fate.

Faith is based on one's own market value.
Milkshakes turn red, not blood, a mere strawberry.

Change pie in the sky to something rhyming with way, it gives a better flow.

The whoel Terri Shaivo's thing is stupid, take it out.

Market value line is fine, the one after it is complete garbage, trash it or redo it.

I like this, but if you can't handle honesty, then get out. If you can handle honesty, then edit this piece, because it has muscle, now you just got ot chip away the fat.

 

[manuscriptx]

Poem content.

I'm basically finding the right mix between traditional rhyming poetry and the prose poetry ( dark poetry / dark passage ) I normally like to write.

" Dare does the penitent man. " has that kind of feel I'm looking for.