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Stop feeling so sorry for yourself. Self-pity is one of the least attractive feats in anyone.
How am I doing that????
Carlos-most people keep information about "mantal(sp) anguish" and the like, well, a bit more privately than you. It isn't exactly something that you just put out there on a forum for others to see. If you had close friends or something like that here, then I could see posting in PMs or the like. This very thread could be seen as a self-pitying thing that you do.