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when you found out the truth.
- Thread starter lahondas
- Start date
Themistocles
New Member
Whoever thought that Jesus was an eternal baby? Since I was tiny I've been making easter gardens on Good Friday, replete with cross-endowed Golgotha and Joseph of Arimathea's tomb. Okay, so I was a morbid infant.
Otherwise I think it was just a gradual realisation, none of those things came as a shock to me, I just slowly began to see what is generally accepted as the truth (for all we know santa and his elves may be hard at work this very minute, painting all those lovely toys for lucky girls and boys!)
Otherwise I think it was just a gradual realisation, none of those things came as a shock to me, I just slowly began to see what is generally accepted as the truth (for all we know santa and his elves may be hard at work this very minute, painting all those lovely toys for lucky girls and boys!)
ControlArmsNow
New Member
No Themistocles, Santa doesn't bring toys to lucky girls and boys, only good ones. So all toyless poor kids clearly need to learn how to behave themselves.
Litany
Active Member
You get this really big bucket and you fill it with Brillo pads and cottage cheese and swing it around your head for a few minutes. Then you eat the contents while turning whiddershins around a virgin goat. Then, 5 days later, the stork arrives and deposits a little baby under a mulberry bush. You have to collect it within 10 minutes of delivery or else a fox will eat it.Martin said:
The stork mostly makes babies out of some sort of mysterious alloy found only on the planet Mungo using a jelly mold she bought in Lakeland Plastics.
ControlArmsNow
New Member
I didn't do any of that stuff, apart from whiddershins around a virgin goat and I've got a four-year-old. My wife has some questions to answer when she gets home! 
True@1stLight
New Member
Ok lets get this straight, Santa is real, Jesus is not, and You HAVE TO CAST THE SPELL for Bday wishes to come true. Gessh , people these days, you guys really should read something every once in awhile 
bobbyburns
New Member
litany, you had me laughing out loud.
Litany
Active Member
Everyone is always confusing sex with babies, which is why there are so many unwanted pregnancies and teen mothers in the world. Frankly, I'm appalled with the state of sex education, where such a simple issue as procreation gets attached to this incomprehensible myth of ovulation, ejaculation and gestation. Come on people, they don't even sound like real words! Honestly, tadpoles that live in your winky? What have you been smoking?
Our sex education teacher even told us that jumping up and down three times after 'sex' would not prevent an unwanted pregnancy. Well, sure it wouldn't if we did things her way. But if you know the truth, and you accidentally swung that bucket, then jumping up and down three times is really the only hope you've got.
Our sex education teacher even told us that jumping up and down three times after 'sex' would not prevent an unwanted pregnancy. Well, sure it wouldn't if we did things her way. But if you know the truth, and you accidentally swung that bucket, then jumping up and down three times is really the only hope you've got.
lahondas
New Member
how to make babies:
humans: the male has a magical organ or (wand), that has magic liquid inside it that can makes babies only when mixed with the magic liquid inside of a puoch in the woman, how to get both magical liquids together is only acheived by touch, how to do that is usually up to the man and woman. how many babies is up to the wand!
dragons: the spit of the male dragon is potent with many male embryos, and when he spits on a female dragon, she produces a baby.
angels: there is good angel dust in the heavens, and when god makes it windy, more angels appear litterally out of know where.
aliens: this is unknown how they create beings of there kind. some say they do it like huiman others say they can clone. its really just a mystery never to be solved.
so martin? ya wanna do it?
humans: the male has a magical organ or (wand), that has magic liquid inside it that can makes babies only when mixed with the magic liquid inside of a puoch in the woman, how to get both magical liquids together is only acheived by touch, how to do that is usually up to the man and woman. how many babies is up to the wand!
dragons: the spit of the male dragon is potent with many male embryos, and when he spits on a female dragon, she produces a baby.
angels: there is good angel dust in the heavens, and when god makes it windy, more angels appear litterally out of know where.
aliens: this is unknown how they create beings of there kind. some say they do it like huiman others say they can clone. its really just a mystery never to be solved.
so martin? ya wanna do it?
