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Every Family Has One...

I have "Crazy Uncle Paul". He sold his house and all of his land so that he can go live out in the wilds of Maine. His wife lives in a slummy apartment he "lets her rent" a couple towns over from us, so he likes to come visit every once in a while and tell us all that the following people are "a**holes":
our whole family, our cousins in quebec, Jewish people, african-americans, asian-americans, arab-americans, portuguese-americans, the english, the scottish, the irish, tall people, skinny people, "yuppies", people who wear glasses, people who drive toyotas, people who live in Massachusetts (or vermont or california), whatever political candidate our family is currently favoring, democrats in general, and on and on....

That's not even the crazy part. He thinks he is a reincarnated civil war soldier and his cat, Shadow, is his reincarnated horse. He was from Maine before he died in the war, so that is why he has moved out there. He bought a run down house with no electricity because it was the house he grew up in (in the previous life of course) and his little sister had drowned in the pond next to it.

Yup. The funny thing is that the gullible person is his fruitcake wife. She had no idea about any of this Civil War crap and has no clue that the entire family knows.

Grammar again. Having a bad day.
 
I used to joke that my family is the definition of dysfunctional. Then I saw the film Eulogy and didn't feel so bad.

My family thinks I'm their "sugar mommy" for some unknown reason - I don't make a ton of money. So, most calls to me are "When can we go out to dinner" (my treat of course) or "I want this new thing!" I prefer to think of myself as the normal one.

One brother is the dreamer - though I give him credit for his perseverence. The other is a lazy bum who shouts obscenities at video games, during holiday get-togethers.
 
we put the fun in dysfunctional. my biological father is the odd one. my sister and i lived with him briefly when my parents first split up, we stayed in bc with him and my mom came east. we lived in a small fishing village in bc. we went to a one room school where i was the only grade 2 student and my sister just came with me as she wasn't old enough for school. we lived in a teepee and we were squatting on gov't property. we lived there about a year before we were reported to both the gov't and social services. then we moved to a cabin that dad rented from some guy he was doing odd jobs for. at that point my dad realized that this was no life for 2 little girls and contacted my mom and we wound up with a story book ending.
my dad, sadly, is a raging alcoholic, and i mean his personality turns to rage when he is drunk. very violent, very bitter.i think my mom broke his heart. we were very fortunate that nothing really terrible happened. so sad because he is a brilliant artist, he carves soapstone, and carpenter. we have no contact with him. not because we are bitter or angry. i send cards and pics of the boys, but i never hear back.
thankfully i have a wonderful stepfather who is really truly our dad.
but it is funny. as a kid i remember thinking what an adventure. now as a parent i am just in awe of what people must have thought.
 
I'm the second of many, so I'm the mommy/hostess/advice-giver, person with extra tissues, a few extra bucks, an aspirin, an extra bed.

But I'm a Gemini, so I'm also the lightning rod, the one who asks the 'wrong' questions, the weeper, the writer who sells people out, the one who would never be parented, disdainer of false authority, seeker of meaning where perhaps there is none. Maybe these two sides are evident here sometimes.

But in my family we are tightly bound, all in love with each other, all confused and childish and trying hard to grow up, all damaged. At least over time we learned to cut each other some slack.
 
My parents are both dead, for years there's only been my sister and I. Yes, I'm the responsible one, and yes she's always been the "problem child." But there are things we like to believe our loved ones are incapable of, that there are lines they'd never cross. So when the accusations were there, I'd buy all the explanations because I didn't believe and didn't want to believe I could love someone so morally bankrupt.

But now, there it is, in her own hand writing, "yes, we've lied, cheated, stolen...but we deserve our kingdom of love." She left out betrayed everyone who's ever really cared about her, but I guess that's a minor point now.
 
i think it changes with the time, in the beginning my sister was the one, who was "different", she stole, took drugs, lied..., then she found her boyfriend and, i hope they get married, she changed,
she became responsible and the "good" child.
so there was only one role for me to play: good guess, the "problem" child, the one who goes away from home, curses when she's mad, walkes around in torn clothes, doesn't care about money, smokes, tries everything...
yap that's me, but i think one day it will change again... :D

Just another question, if you are the "problem child" or the one who is different etc. Do you mind, or be proud of it, or what do you feel?
 
Martin said:
I'm the only one in my immediate family that has (or will have) a college degree, and they tend to think that I think I'm smarter than them.
Click to expand...
Well you are ;) I get the same - I'm the only one with a degree :)
 
Imagine that Christmas dinner!

"Mom, dad, I have something to tell you."
"Oh my god, you're gay."
"No, it's more complicated than that, and you wouldn't understand, but that's the entire point, really ... "

:D

Cheers
 
Ice said:
:p No, I can't see that going down too well.
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sorry to barge in there, but do you really think that your loved ones care if you are smarter than them? I don't ...
right now, i'm the only one without a degree and i certainly don't think that that makes a difference, i think they love you, no matter what you do, are or think!
 
I didn't say that they care - I said that it can cause friction - they sometimes think I talk down to them, belittle them.

Cheers
 
Martin - very amusing :p

Honeydevil - I don't think it matters one iota, of course they still love you and they are proud that you have achieved something (well parents anyway) :) However, it does lead to comments such as

Just because you've got a degree ...
I know you're the only one to have gone to University ...

:)
 
I, too, have abrother that thinks prison is a place to go when you want to change religions (he's on his third religion). He's a drug addict as well. So he's the black sheep. I've got one of those weird uncles, you know,the one that is trying to sue everyone for bizarre reasons and is the one you least want to sit across the table from lest you puke at his gross table manners. He was a postman in New Jersey. Now he's going on a trip to Spain and I really want to warn someone!

Our family has the creative mother (my mother writes books and films), the Liz Taylor wannabe (my father, marriage number 3) and there's me, if it weren't for my brother, I'd be the black sheep. My other two brothers are regular guys. One's a Ranger in the army, just got back from Iraq safely, and the other is a cop in the corn fields. I, too, am the first of us kids to have any degrees. My family is really, really weird.
 
Ice said:
Martin - very amusing :p

Honeydevil - I don't think it matters one iota, of course they still love you and they are proud that you have achieved something (well parents anyway) :) However, it does lead to comments such as

Just because you've got a degree ...
I know you're the only one to have gone to University ...

:)
Click to expand...

i'm sorry, i know that this comments come and the only thing i wanted to draw your attention to, is that doesn't matter how dysfunctionel your family is, or how different you are or how much they criticize you, they still love you...
oh and i have a similar problem, i have a couple diseases such as asthma..., so i don't get the comments about education, i get the comments about my dysfunctions, such as

just because you have ... that doesn't mean...
 
RitalinKid said:
I'm from a tightly knit conservative family. My brother was the blacksheep, and I am the loner that doesn't quite fit in. Everyone else in the family talks multiple times a day, but I just don't have that much to say, mainly because I have completely different interests for whatever reasons.
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I'm definately the loner, possibly also the black sheep :eek: (not because I'm bad - my sister has just never done anything wrong :rolleyes: )

I know exactly what you mean - the rest of my family talk all the time where as I find I have very little to say. I see them often at the moment as i'm temping for the same company my mum works for, however, when I lived at uni I didn't see them often at all and only phoned about once a week. I love my family but we certainly don't have common interests.
 
Martin said:
I didn't say that they care - I said that it can cause friction - they sometimes think I talk down to them, belittle them.

Cheers
Click to expand...
Precisely my point (and no I don't do it either ;) ), which hence gives rise to the comments I gave earlier :)
 
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