My favorite is in my signature. I have no idea to whom it should be attributed but I love it.
"No good deed goes unpunished." - Clare Boothe Luce
"Prohibit the taking of omens, and do away with superstitious doubts. Then, until death itself comes, no calamity need be feared. " - Sun Tzu
"Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them." - William Shakepeare
"Better a witty fool than a foolish wit." - William Shakespeare
"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity." - Edgar Allan Poe
"Words empty as the wind are best left unsaid. " - Homer
"People want to know why I do this, why I write such gross stuff. I like to tell them I have the heart of a small boy... and I keep it in a jar on my desk." - Stephen King
"The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be. " - Socrates
"As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake." - Mark Twain
"Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company." - Mark Twain
"May the bridges I burn light my way." - Not sure
"Be wary of the man who urges an action in which he himself incurs no risk." - Joaquin Setanti