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Have we lost Stewart too?

I can't help but think you're overreacting, Moto.

People have real lives, and can't keep spending hours on here every day, don't think so much about it, just enjoy those that *are* here at the moment, and be pleasantly surprised when Someone returns from what could just be a busy week. I mean, sheesh, I was away from the internet for more than 2 weeks this summer, no one on any of the forums I'm at started wondering where I'd gone to, even though I am in the top 5 of posters, and I'm not exactly one to post a thread telling everyone I'll be gone for x days.

I'm not all used to seeing such an awareness of when people have posted last, so I think it's all just a bit silly and paranoid. But maybe that's just me...

In the mere 2½ years I've been on Icewind Dale, I've seen so many generations of members come and go that it no longer really gets to me. No matter which generation they're from they'll always be longing back to how things were when they arrived, and the generations after them will always have brought some qualities with them that the 'old geezers' don't approve of. People come and go, including those we like - get used to it.

[/cynicism]
 
he's just wondering... and well, some people (like me) aren't apart of that many forums and perhaps become attached to the people online that they talk to on a regular basis... perhaps even consider them as friends... and if all your friends go away... well... then it sucks.

Motokid and everyone else knows that we all have real lives and can't always be online all the time... that some of us just do not have the time... but it doesn't hurt to ask what's going on.
 
That's correct Libra6poe...I'm just asking....Stewart has certainly been an extremely active member in the last 9 months that I've been here. I know that people come and go....hell, that's life....but it's certainly a fact that there has been a changing of the guard in the last few months. Almost all of the people I battled with, joked with, conversed with, annoyed, and came to respect seemed to have decided to move on.

Can they be replaced? I don't know yet. Doesn't change the fact that I'm noticing a trend that doesn't make me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Can I change any of it. Nope.

But I also don't have to sit back and accept it without at least posting a question in hopes that some of the members might log back in and at least tell me/us they have not left...just too busy at the moment....

I question everything....that's what I do....
 
Libra6Poe said:
he's just wondering... and well, some people (like me) aren't apart of that many forums and perhaps become attached to the people online that they talk to on a regular basis... perhaps even consider them as friends... and if all your friends go away... well... then it sucks.
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Yeah, I know the feeling.
 
I'm glad you understand SFG...

This is the only forum that I really take part in... and it's because I really like the people here. But if too many people go away it won't be the same.
 
Motokid said:
That's correct Libra6poe...I'm just asking....Stewart has certainly been an extremely active member in the last 9 months that I've been here. I know that people come and go....hell, that's life....but it's certainly a fact that there has been a changing of the guard in the last few months. Almost all of the people I battled with, joked with, conversed with, annoyed, and came to respect seemed to have decided to move on.

Can they be replaced? I don't know yet. Doesn't change the fact that I'm noticing a trend that doesn't make me feel all warm and fuzzy.
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I understand your sentiment and all but...

But I also don't have to sit back and accept it without at least posting a question in hopes that some of the members might log back in and at least tell me/us they have not left...just too busy at the moment....
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If they're too busy at the moment they won't see your post anyway and won't return any sooner for it.
 
Jemima Aslana said:
I understand your sentiment and all but...

If they're too busy at the moment they won't see your post anyway and won't return any sooner for it.
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But if they are lurking to see what's going on....and they see that some of us miss them, they may sign on to reduce the rumors?

Get it?

Everybody, banned or not, has the ability to come check things out as "guests"....and I know that many do....so seeing a request to be a part of things may actually result in getting answers to my questions....

This thread is really not that outrageous.....really it's not....
 
Motokid said:
But if they are lurking to see what's going on....and they see that some of us miss them, they may sign on to reduce the rumors?
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At the same time though, you have to consider that some people may not want to be listed as MIA. Jemima is right. They might be busy, they might just be cycling out. Either way, people should have the right to leave (or restrict their use) privately if they want to. I don't think we are owed an explanation at all. I've also seen a number of people mentioned as "missing" or "gone" around here lately who weren't either. As far as Stewart goes, I know for a fact that he is aware this thread exists. Whether he's seen it, I can't say. He hasn't chosen to answer it, so I'd think that should be proof right there that we shouldn't collectively be expecting an explanation from every member who leaves or restricts their use.
 
Motokid said:
but it never hurts to ask....
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It's just a personal opinion, but to me PMs are for asking. If a person has PMs turned off, I take that as evidence that they don't want to be asked by the general populace. It is a theory at least worth considering.

I know if I were to leave I wouldn't want a memorial thread (or a mention of me being missing in a "what's wrong with this place?" type thread). I'd contact people I wanted to find me and hope that that would be the end of it.
 
I know if I were to leave I wouldn't want a memorial thread (or a mention of me being missing in a "what's wrong with this place?" type thread). I'd contact people I wanted to find me and hope that that would be the end of it.
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Excellent point.
 
Jemima said:
If they're too busy at the moment they won't see your post anyway and won't return any sooner for it.
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But they'll most likely see it eventually. Sooner or later or never isn't really the point. :rolleyes:
 
mehastings said:
It's just a personal opinion, but to me PMs are for asking. If a person has PMs turned off, I take that as evidence that they don't want to be asked by the general populace. It is a theory at least worth considering.

I know if I were to leave I wouldn't want a memorial thread (or a mention of me being missing in a "what's wrong with this place?" type thread). I'd contact people I wanted to find me and hope that that would be the end of it.
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So true, and I can definitely also do without having my mailbox flooded with notices about having a Private Message waiting for me. There's nothing I hate more than people sending me PM's asking me questions that time would have answered for them had they had the patience to wait.

Have a wonderful example of a dude who was going to leave a forum for a while and then PMed me to make sure his account would remain active. He could have checked the memberlist and he would have seen people with less than half his number of posts whom we haven't seen in years still have active accounts - no need for asking at all, hence a waste of my time. Of course it didn't make it better that half his PM consisted of sucking up to me in my function of Admin. For that alone I was tempted to terminate his account hehe

Ahem

*swerves back on topic*

But they'll most likely see it eventually. Sooner or later or never isn't really the point.
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No, but if they come back, this thread has been effectively pointless, and if they don't, it has also been pointless. I'm with mehastings on this one, I wouldn't want major lamentations going on over my absence either. Those I like would be notified of the reasons for my absence and would thus have no reason to post a thread, those I don't notify clearly didn't mean much to me anyway and should thus not have much reason to post a thread anyway :p (A bit offensive perhaps - but I'm not known for stirring warm and fuzzy feelings in people)
 
Whilst it's always sad when long standing members move on or decrease their contribution, that's the nature of message boards; people come and go, the membership changes all the time.

What is of more concern perhaps, is that a few recent, well meaning threads have erupted into argument and led to a significant number of regular posters leaving for pastures new. I've no idea of how the posting levels are looking compared to a few weeks ago but the place definately feels less occupied of late. Perhaps that leads to others wanting to post less and we find the forum spiraling down, or perhaps people are just taking stock after recent events.

As for me, I'm losing myself in a good book: 'Life and Fate' by Vasily Grossman.

Regards,

K-S
 
Just let people ask... it doesn't hurt and if you don't want that somebody misses you, just turn everything off and crawl under your bed...
 
So if somebody really special to TBF, like Stewart or Novella or xxxxxxxxx were to just disappear for no apparent reason the best thing for all of us to do is just sit back....say **** 'em and the horse they rode in on, and get on with life like nobody cares huh?????

Just ignore the whole thing like they never existed.....


Not my style.
 
Moto, I can see your point. It is hard when people we are used to seeing suddenly seem to disappear. It makes us worry that something may have gone wrong for them and since they are 'online friends', we don't always know how to contact them to make sure all is well.

At the same time, I have to agree with Jem and Mehastings. Sometimes people just need a break and they don't want to offer any explanations for why they need that break. I'm a mod at the same forum Jem is Admin at and recently things happened in my life that caused me to lose interest in the internet. I knew I wouldn't be able to do any 'modding'. I pmed the owner of the site, told him I wouldn't be posting for a while and that was it. There is no way I would have wanted to answer a topic or post a thread telling people of why I was gone. My reasons were personal. I guess it is easy for us to forget sometimes that the people we communicate with at forums actually do have real lives. I don't think you should worry.

Stewart did make it fairly clear in another topic that he preferred to post in the book related topics rather than the general chat section. Perhaps he has just not seen any topics he is interested in posting in recently.
 
Motokid said:
So if somebody really special to TBF, like Stewart or Novella or xxxxxxxxx were to just disappear for no apparent reason the best thing for all of us to do is just sit back....say **** 'em and the horse they rode in on, and get on with life like nobody cares huh?????
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Well, that's the apparent attitude people had when Robert leaving. To me, he was "really special" to this board and contributed a lot. I don't remember much hand-wringing when he left. Sorry, but I don't strike up the band when others head on out, nor do I expect anyone to do so for me should I decide to post a lot less or leave entirely.
 
The circumstances behind Roberts departure, and some of the others that have left in the last few weeks are really very different.

You can't compare Roberts undisciplined, emotional outburst, and subsequent "I'm taking my ball and going somewhere else because I can't handle the people here" to the slow fade out, and vanishing of those who have been members here for years.

I wish Robert had never left, but the manner in which he departed left no question as to why he did it. Plus, he's more than welcome to return any time he wishes just like the others.
 
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