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Mandatory reading time at home?
- Thread starter Motokid
- Start date
Motokid
New Member
Hay82,
I’m not saying you can’t learn things from watching, and I’m not saying you can’t offer valuable information on the subject of child raising if you don’t have kids of your own. What I’m saying is it’s so entertaining how quickly, and with how much enthusiasm people without kids love to give this kind of advice. I’m no more of an expert than you are. I can only offer ideas based on my own experiences, and what I’ve learned from watching others too. The difference is in how I present the information. People without kids tend to make their opinion sound so matter of fact and simple. They make it seem so black and white, when those of us with children know things are almost always gray. What works for one does not work for all. Keep giving advice when you see fit, and when people like me ask for it. Just don’t be surprised when you get a smile.
I’m not saying you can’t learn things from watching, and I’m not saying you can’t offer valuable information on the subject of child raising if you don’t have kids of your own. What I’m saying is it’s so entertaining how quickly, and with how much enthusiasm people without kids love to give this kind of advice. I’m no more of an expert than you are. I can only offer ideas based on my own experiences, and what I’ve learned from watching others too. The difference is in how I present the information. People without kids tend to make their opinion sound so matter of fact and simple. They make it seem so black and white, when those of us with children know things are almost always gray. What works for one does not work for all. Keep giving advice when you see fit, and when people like me ask for it. Just don’t be surprised when you get a smile.
Miss Shelf
New Member
I have 9 nieces and nephews, so I learned early on that my opinions weren't welcome! But, I think having a dog will make it a bit easier when you start to have kids. People are also quick to tell me what I should be doing or shouldn't be doing with my dog. "Yes, yes, yes, I probably should or should not do something, but it works for me and my dog, so butt out", is what I think.
honeydevil
Active Member
Billy Oblivion said:
i think it is just your family, i go with yelling and throwing things, but beating the hell out of a familymember is unusually!!
abecedarian
Well-Known Member
Ok Moto, it's been nearly 7 months since March 6( a great day I might add since I celebrate 2 holidays on that date). How did your experiment work? What modificatations did you make, and is this "silent reading" still part of your family culture?
I DO have a passle of kids,but that doesn't mean I'm an expert.but we have found for our own sanity and for the sake of getting any schoolwork done, that tv or movies are allowed only on weekends. We've always severely limited tv, so it wasn't anything new.
When I was in the seventh grade, my middle school tried a program called "Better Together"-hey it was 1973, and that's the best they could think of.. Anyway, each day a different class period was devoted to silent reading. No TESTS!! Even in gym class, the teachers and kids were expected to sit for a whole hour or so and read. For those not in the habit of carrying a book to read just for fun, each teacher had a supply of books and magazines on hand. We quickly learned which teachers to trust for good material and who was clueless..I was already a rabid reader, but this experience taught me to always carry at least one book I wouldn't mind being stuck with for an hour or so. I started shopping for purses that could hold everything but the kitchen sink..
So, I doubt an hour or so devoted to "Better Together" is gonna ruin a child..and I think it can be done in a fun, much more personalized way than my school experience.
I DO have a passle of kids,but that doesn't mean I'm an expert.but we have found for our own sanity and for the sake of getting any schoolwork done, that tv or movies are allowed only on weekends. We've always severely limited tv, so it wasn't anything new.
When I was in the seventh grade, my middle school tried a program called "Better Together"-hey it was 1973, and that's the best they could think of.. Anyway, each day a different class period was devoted to silent reading. No TESTS!! Even in gym class, the teachers and kids were expected to sit for a whole hour or so and read. For those not in the habit of carrying a book to read just for fun, each teacher had a supply of books and magazines on hand. We quickly learned which teachers to trust for good material and who was clueless..I was already a rabid reader, but this experience taught me to always carry at least one book I wouldn't mind being stuck with for an hour or so. I started shopping for purses that could hold everything but the kitchen sink..
So, I doubt an hour or so devoted to "Better Together" is gonna ruin a child..and I think it can be done in a fun, much more personalized way than my school experience.
Motokid
New Member
Like most experiments this one kinda fizzled out....there was so much going on around the house through the summer that "reading time" took a back seat to everything else.
Now that school has started the little one has had homework that requires 20 minutes of reading a day.....she uses the kitchen timer so she knows exactly how much time is left, and not a second more in most cases....
maybe she'll grow into reading for fun.....
Now that school has started the little one has had homework that requires 20 minutes of reading a day.....she uses the kitchen timer so she knows exactly how much time is left, and not a second more in most cases....
maybe she'll grow into reading for fun.....
abecedarian
Well-Known Member
How old is your dd? Do you read to her? Even my 12 year son still brings me books to read aloud. Other than that, being a good role model and providing great books is about all any of us can do. My oldest son didn't get into reading for fun until a friend of his gave him some books, and told him how good they were. This one of those situations where a magic wand would be very handy...
Sergo
New Member
abecedarian said:
Yep, and some time ago I read "Three Musketeers" to my daughter - when she was 13. After that she has read herself almost everything available by A. Dumas... This year I wanted to read her "The Children of Captain Grant" - but somehow failed to do that... OK, I'll wait for long winter evenings... Or she is too old for that now???
abecedarian
Well-Known Member
I've don't know if they're ever too old to be read to..I'm not 
My dh occassionally chooses a book and reads it to all of us in the evenings, by kerosene lamplight. This works beautifully for almost any classic, and specially well for any story with an old-fashioned tone or setting. The special lighting signals that this is a special time, and if they get too loud, the special time is over for the evening.
My dh occassionally chooses a book and reads it to all of us in the evenings, by kerosene lamplight. This works beautifully for almost any classic, and specially well for any story with an old-fashioned tone or setting. The special lighting signals that this is a special time, and if they get too loud, the special time is over for the evening.
abecedarian
Well-Known Member
SFG75 said:Put the t.v. in the basement and "mandatory" becomes "voluntarily chosen"
We had ours in the back bedroom, faced against the wall..and you'd be amazed at the people who tried to give us tvs so we "wouldn't have to do without!"
When the Challenger exploded, we had to dig the portable black and white out of the closet..
When the 9/11 tragedy occured, we had to dig out the coaxle cable to jerry-rig the tv because there was no antenna..
Now and then my dh takes the vcr and dvd players to our room to give the movies a rest!
Kookamoor
New Member
I must have missed this thread when it first came around. As you know I'm not a parent and I love to read, but here are my two and a half cents.
When I was in Grade 5 I had the most wonderful teacher who, every morning, would require us to write. We would have 30 - 45 minutes or so to write - whatever we wanted. We could work on a story or poem, start something new, or if we couldn't think of anything to say, he used to tell us to describe the room and people around us - what they were doing, their emotions, the things around them, etc. I used to love this time. We did the same thing in the library once a week with reading. Not that getting me to read was ever difficult.
Another method my parents employed was incentives/bribary/blackmail. I don't know what to call it. Basically, when dinner was over I had a choice. I could either do the dishes or do my homework. Believe me, homework always looked good! Perhaps you could employ that with your daughter too?
Another method may be to read the book your daughter is reading and talk about it with her along the way. Put the characters in different scenarios and make them come alive. Or get her a book which has been turned into a movie (one she hasn't seen). Read the book, then watch the movie and compare the two. Maybe she'll begin to see that movies cannot capture everything a book can.
I don't know. It must be so hard to engage a child in reading when they don't want to do it. What's the difference between forcing a child to read and forcing a child to do karate?
When I was in Grade 5 I had the most wonderful teacher who, every morning, would require us to write. We would have 30 - 45 minutes or so to write - whatever we wanted. We could work on a story or poem, start something new, or if we couldn't think of anything to say, he used to tell us to describe the room and people around us - what they were doing, their emotions, the things around them, etc. I used to love this time. We did the same thing in the library once a week with reading. Not that getting me to read was ever difficult.
Another method my parents employed was incentives/bribary/blackmail. I don't know what to call it. Basically, when dinner was over I had a choice. I could either do the dishes or do my homework. Believe me, homework always looked good! Perhaps you could employ that with your daughter too?
Another method may be to read the book your daughter is reading and talk about it with her along the way. Put the characters in different scenarios and make them come alive. Or get her a book which has been turned into a movie (one she hasn't seen). Read the book, then watch the movie and compare the two. Maybe she'll begin to see that movies cannot capture everything a book can.
I don't know. It must be so hard to engage a child in reading when they don't want to do it. What's the difference between forcing a child to read and forcing a child to do karate?
Motokid
New Member
Kook,
My children are not forced to do karate. They are forced to pick an activity that requires some form of physical, strenuous activity. Something to get the blood flowing and the heart rate up. They transitioned through dance, gymnastics, figure skating, ice hockey, swim team, and now karate. They pretty much get to choose what they want to participate in. They will be able to quit karate (which will break my heart a bit) if/when they are able to come up with a suitable alternative. I will allow them to have a month or two off if that's what they want, but they have to be involved in something. My oldest does say she has a desire to get her black belt. My youngest, again, is the problem. She's yet to find her niche.
The difference is physical health verses.....what????....if I hade to choose between children that got no exercise and read all the time, or children who were constantly moving and active I'd go with the active children for now. A love for reading can always grow with time. Lazy and unhealthy are much harder lifestyles to break in my opinion.
My children are not forced to do karate. They are forced to pick an activity that requires some form of physical, strenuous activity. Something to get the blood flowing and the heart rate up. They transitioned through dance, gymnastics, figure skating, ice hockey, swim team, and now karate. They pretty much get to choose what they want to participate in. They will be able to quit karate (which will break my heart a bit) if/when they are able to come up with a suitable alternative. I will allow them to have a month or two off if that's what they want, but they have to be involved in something. My oldest does say she has a desire to get her black belt. My youngest, again, is the problem. She's yet to find her niche.
The difference is physical health verses.....what????....if I hade to choose between children that got no exercise and read all the time, or children who were constantly moving and active I'd go with the active children for now. A love for reading can always grow with time. Lazy and unhealthy are much harder lifestyles to break in my opinion.
SFG75
Well-Known Member
We have a relative who has five t.v.s in their home. Two in each kids's rooms, their room, as well as the living room. When we visit, the wife and I will just go room to room turning everything off. And they wonder why their electrical bill is always high.
We have a storm-surger pad with all the plugs. I just turn that off after school and the kids and I do something outside. When they want in and realize the t.v. won't turn on, well, playing baseball becomes an attractive option again.
abecedarian
Well-Known Member
And don't forget dark tag..and monopoly..or shootin hoops.. just about anything we can name is better than sitting in front of the tv. My kids like to draw and paint, so they'll grab several old newspaper sections and spread them across the dining table and create for hours. For several years now, they've made banners to hang at Christmas time. Some have been spectacular. One year, my oldest dd collected a rubbermaid tub full of various kinds of art supplies and gave it as a collective gift for all the yougner kids..she even found mask forms, and they spent lots of time making the most innovative masks in the world..and never missed the tv at all..Sometimes they make some awful messes, and my carpet looks gawd awful, but its worth it to me to see them creating masterpieces and memories rather than just vegetating in front of the tube.
MonkeyCatcher
New Member
At my school we have D.E.A.R (Drop Everything And Read) weeks, where at the start of fourth period every day, we have to silent read for 20 mins. I love it, but most of the other kids groan a bit. For a lot of the kids at school, this is the only chance that they get to read without it seeming "uncool" or "a waste of time", so of course I'm all for it. Whatever gets people reading and helps to encourage them to continue reading in their spare time is great in my books.
Kookamoor
New Member
Sorry, Moto. I think my wording was poor in my last post - 'force' was the wrong word and completely not what I think I was trying to say. I actually really like your idea of ensuring kids do at least one physical activity. I also agree with your choice - active kids would be far healthier, because goodness knows I went to school with unhealthy kids who kept to themselves socially and just read, but were ultimately unable to interact with other kids and were physically unhealthy, which futher destined them to social hell. All bad.Motokid said:
abec - your household sounds amazing. I've always wanted to have a big family (and trust me, the clock is ticking) and I'm picking up all sorts of tips from you! I used to love crafts as a kid, but I wish I'd had my parents and brother involved, it would have been so much more fun!