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My New Story Idea (In Part)

-Carlos-

-Carlos-

New Member
I just came up with another fantastic idea for a story. I am so excited about this one folks that my thrill is beyond words. In part it’s about Astrophysics scientists, world renowned specialist in the field. He is working in his giant telescope facility trying to discover any new formations – undiscovered elements in space – when his wife phones him. She reminds him that their son, an only child, was turning eight (8) in a few days.

The next day the father scientist decides to teach his young son the wonders of space via a telescope, the gift. The father chooses to purchase the same model telescope his father bought him at that same age. The night after the birthday gathering, the son and father drive out of the city where the stars could be viewed in all their glory. He teaches his son the basic of how to use the telescope before the scientist points it towards the most visible part of the night so his son can discover the glory above him. But when the son looks through the eye finder, he only sees a large crack in the lens. His father then looks through the telescope but only sees that it is dirty – no crack.

The story develops very nicely. It’s what the father sees through his child’s telescope, something that is not detected through his giant telescope, that moves the story forward to its unexpected and quite thrilling ending.

I adore when ideas/stories come naturally like this one did this afternoon. I get such a natural high when this occurs that I feel that I am walking on air. I hope to get started on it soon. It’s going to be a good one.

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AquaBlue said:
In part it’s about Astrophysics scientists, world renowned specialist in the field. He is working in his giant telescope facility trying to discover any new formations
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Have you ever heard the expression 'write what you know'?
 
This story sounds a lot like the story of the boy that drew a star and later found the star he was looking for in his child.
 
It doesn't matter where the story veers off to if no one can get past the clunky opening.
 
Yes. I've learned that Litany. I try to relax before I begin to write with the goal of letting the wording breathe. Spreading things out more will actually make it easier for me to relax any anxieties that might creep up during the writing process. Thanks for mentioning that Litany. I always need reminding.
 
A good, solid first sentence is key - it's the springboard, I feel, into the whole tale. Capturing the reading is paramount early on.
 
sparkchaser said:
How will a cheap amateur telescope see something that his multi-million dollar one won't?

The bit at 1:09-1:12 is very related:

YouTube - Office Space Pet Rock Scene
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It's a story...fiction. It's not the telescope(s), it's the scientist himself. All is explained as the story moves along. Nothing is what it seems in this one. Again, it has a 'twilight zone' flavor. What he sees or doesn't see points to a larger meaning. A meaning that the character will resolve and the reader delight in its discovery. There other factors as well. There is much more to it spark. :)
 
sparkchaser said:
This story sounds a lot like the story of the boy that drew a star and later found the star he was looking for in his child.
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Oh no. They might sound familiar but Jim's Star is a half-ass tale in comparison to that of the scientist and his son. Worlds apart. One is about the discovery of life and love and the other...well...it's about what makes us human (deep I know). :whistling:
 
Terry Nation already covered discovering a new world inside a magical telescope. Rebecca's World. Ace kid's book. I heartily recommend it.
 
Writer's Showcase is a place where people write the text of their poems, short-stories or chapters of a book.

If you want to tell someone about a synopsis; do it in one of the other areas of the website.

Like.

For example.

Author Discussion; Fiction/Non-Fiction or General Chat.

No charge for the advice; this one's on me.
 
It has nothing to do with the telescope actually. It's what he witnesses through that telescope that is of importance. It's all about the character.

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Aqua, how about you write the story and then post it here so people can give their input on it? The way this thread is going it looks like one of those threads where people write a story together by completing the previous sentence...
 
Landslide said:
Aqua, how about you write the story and then post it here so people can give their input on it? The way this thread is going it looks like one of those threads where people write a story together by completing the previous sentence...
Click to expand...

manuscriptx said:
Writer's Showcase is a place where people write the text of their poems, short-stories or chapters of a book.
Click to expand...

I am with them.
 
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