Okies, this is kind of freaky.
New developments.
But first of all, thank you phill T for your tips, I have managed to track down the IP address and tracked it down to Finland- Helsinki, funnily enough!
Secondly, you know that close good friend- the cop I mentioned from Finland, well she received the same email later, bascially a pastiche of messages copied and pasted from this forum-selectively. I didn't realise this when I got them, but now thinking about them, they were all views and opinions and issues that she felt strongly about and designed to perhaps rile her up specifically. It was targeted specific things that were sent.
She's had the message checked and got a specialist data analyser in- and on her computer and thinks her computer is being hacked- I know little about these things.
Anyways, the desired result has been achieved she was very upset as was I and we're no longer friends
Lesson- I guess even in a decent clean moderated forum like this, be careful of what you say, and never underestimate th underhandedness that people can be capable of and motives even from seemingly simple and innocent posts. Seems far fetched I know!