Who cares?

[WriterJohnB]

I’m posting this here because I don’t want the evil doctor “M” to go any farther off the edge and he never looks at any thread but his own apparently. But if he follows, what the heck, I’m a Vietnam vet, an ex-cop and I’m used to shooting varmints.

What Happens?

What happens? What happens, when an inept, insignificant neophyte deludes himself that he is an undiscovered intellectual prodigy?

What happens? What happens, when he haphazardly spews symbols of an established and precise written language in a disarray that causes the language becomes disjointed and hallucinatory to any other human psyche?

What happens? What happens, when the maelstroms of psychotic pandemonium
aspire and fail to generate a coherent cogitation?

What happens? What happens, when it becomes too excruciating for him to differentiate between something bona fide and something surreal?

What happens? What happens, when he is both narcissistic and onanistic?

What happens? What happens, when he practices mental autoeroticism?

What happens? What happens, when he cannot spell apology,
and ignores his literary impuissance?

What happens? What happens, when he acknowledges the evaluation of erudite, accomplished, and yea, even lauded authors by retorting with premonishments of violent confrontation.

I see what I see, a tortured soul, an ill-fated beginning, middle and eternal bedlam of oblivious consciousness, who forever abide as a prerequisite example of obtuseness due to a phrenitically devoid capacity of intellect.

What happens? Shit happens.

See! It’s understandable, it just needed a minor rewrite.

 

[ValkyrieRaven88]

Bravo. You won first place in the delightful parody of the year contest. (I was going to give it to Thickney, but yours was even better.)

 

[WriterJohnB]

Thanks, Val,

Damn, there's a typo or two in there. I posted hurriedly due to job pressures. Why the heck can't you edit posts in this forum, you who are in charge of this palace of palaver?

JohnB

 

[mehastings]

Thanks, Val,

Damn, there's a typo or two in there. I posted hurriedly due to job pressures. Why the heck can't you edit posts in this forum, you who are in charge of this palace of palaver?

JohnB

It is so that when you write not nice things about other members (like their potential need for life insurance) you can't go and take them back later on. We've had problems with that in the past.

 

[WriterJohnB]

Thanks, me. I didn't really expect a reply, but I'm glad you did because your answer makes good sense.

JohnB

 

[ValkyrieRaven88]

Everyone makes type-o's. No one's gonna hold it against you. I'm sure I'll make a couple in this post since I'm dead tired and too lazy to run it through a spellcheck on Word first.

I wonder if manuscript will see this next time he signs on. Apparently there's people viewing his things, but no one is posting on them. Buy then again, I'm sure no one else wants to get involved in things. He might tell them to keep their life insurance up to date.

P.S. WriterJohn, I took a peek at your website and I am interested in the book. Do you know if I could find it at a local Border's?

 

[WriterJohnB]

No, Val, my book is only available on the Genre Mall, so far. My publisher is "small press," and we're both only starting out. I make no bones about the fact that I'm "barely" published and won't consider myself truly on track until I start getting advances, instead of just royalties. But, hey, I made a couple of hundred last month and I haven't had to put up any money at all. That's what pissed me off about "M" saying I was only trying to advertise. I gave an honest assessment of my skills, just so he could not say I was an inexperienced "fool," who couldn't understand his work. And the idiot called me a farce, even though he's had no critical acclaim and made no money at all. I hope you've seen his "cinematographic" movie, har-har.

But thank you for the compliment of being interested in my book. I only gave them non-exclusive rights, so if it does well, I can still have my agent (who I didn't have when I agreed to publish) send it to major publishers. If you'd really like to read it and don't want to buy, I'll send you the manuscript as an attachment to an e-mail, or however you'd like to work it out if we can do it through the forum and you don't want to give me your address. If you want to e-mail me, just click on the link on my site.

Take care,

JB

 

[sirmyk]

If you'd really like to read it and don't want to buy, I'll send you the manuscript as an attachment to an e-mail, or however you'd like to work it out if we can do it through the forum and you don't want to give me your address. If you want to e-mail me, just click on the link on my site.

I would love it if you'd send me the first ten pages or so via e-mail. If it raises at least one of my eyebrows, I will happily purchase a copy from the source you mentioned. My e-mail address is author@palindromehannah.com, if that offer also applies to me.

 

[WriterJohnB]

Prologue and first chapter on the way. Thanks for your interest. But you need to beware, I have NO way of proving that I'm a published author and, if I am, I'm a fraud.

JohnB

 

[ValkyrieRaven88]

No, Val, my book is only available on the Genre Mall, so far. My publisher is "small press," and we're both only starting out. I make no bones about the fact that I'm "barely" published and won't consider myself truly on track until I start getting advances, instead of just royalties. But, hey, I made a couple of hundred last month and I haven't had to put up any money at all. That's what pissed me off about "M" saying I was only trying to advertise. I gave an honest assessment of my skills, just so he could not say I was an inexperienced "fool," who couldn't understand his work. And the idiot called me a farce, even though he's had no critical acclaim and made no money at all. I hope you've seen his "cinematographic" movie, har-har.

But thank you for the compliment of being interested in my book. I only gave them non-exclusive rights, so if it does well, I can still have my agent (who I didn't have when I agreed to publish) send it to major publishers. If you'd really like to read it and don't want to buy, I'll send you the manuscript as an attachment to an e-mail, or however you'd like to work it out if we can do it through the forum and you don't want to give me your address. If you want to e-mail me, just click on the link on my site.

Take care,

JB

What's funny about this is that he was the one trying to advertise himself and his book to a publisher. You never said, "Come buy my book." In fact, you're being very modest (something our mutual friend is not) about your work.

I'll send you an e-mail. I'd love to read the book.

 

[Vespertilio91]

I'll send you an e-mail. I'd love to read the book.

Then you'll give it to me, right?

(Sorry, buddy, I'm a poor high schooler. I don't have money to buy things...and I'm too young to work, yet.)

 

[Vespertilio91]

That parody is absolutely hilarious. I give you 1,000,000 fake dollars for it.

 

[WriterJohnB]

Then you'll give it to me, right?

(Sorry, buddy, I'm a poor high schooler. I don't have money to buy things...and I'm too young to work, yet.)

If you'd like to read it, I'll send you (or anyone else) a copy in .doc format. Since you'd never heard of me anyway, it's not like I'm losing a sale Just send me your e-mail address. I only sent a chapter to the other two in order for them to determine if they'd like to read the whole exciting, gripping, stunning, well-written literary masterpiece

JohnB

 

[ValkyrieRaven88]

I'm probably going to print it out to read, so I can give you a copy at school, Vespertilio.

 

[Vespertilio91]

Oh, ok! Thanks.

 

[ValkyrieRaven88]

Stylish Girls, pregnancy walk away and beat them into submission. Pretty Lips, vaginal, is not of the mouth. I sometimes wonder what it takes to open them with sweet sounds.

...does anyone else find this intensely frightening? Maybe that's the reason no one has commented on this particular poem.

 

[WriterJohnB]

OMG, I had stopped reading his posts. Yes, he's like a little baby looking for attention by shocking everyone. But he's not a child; he's dangerous. I don't respond to his posts, although I'd actually welcome his crap if he tried to come against me, because I'd love to get down and dirty. But I do have children and beloved animals, at risk because such is the manner in which disturbed people respond. I'm going to complain to a moderator immediately. This has gone too far. Val, thank your lucky stars that you are not on the same continent as this freak.

JohnB

 

[Vespertilio91]

thank your lucky stars that you are not on the same continent as this freak.

But in reality, she is, as I am as well, and hundreds of these wonderful people on the forum. But truly, if he were to snap, do you think he'd leave them all alone. NO. He would search the highest mountains and coldest tundra to wreak his havok. His mind is completely warped, and little will save it now.

Check out his latest post on eye of the eye. In response to Stewart disproving him, he relates it to "The Little Engine That Could."! How does someone catch that within the lines???

 

[beer good]

Check out his latest post on eye of the eye. In response to Stewart disproving him, he relates it to "The Little Engine That Could."! How does someone catch that within the lines???

I don't think that's so strange. I usually find myself quoting from the latest book I read, too. But of course, my reading habits have evolved since kindergarten...

 

[WriterJohnB]

I don't think that's so strange. I usually find myself quoting from the latest book I read, too. But of course, my reading habits have evolved since kindergarten...

But not your taste in stuffed toys? Actually, I like it, I'm not a chthulu fan but it's a neat idea.

As to the other thing, isn't it amazing that he doesn't bother to look at anyone else's threads but his own? I won't respond to him anymore, hoping he will go somewhere else to satisfy his childish yearning for attention. Oh, hell, I guess I have to admit that if I had no job, no driver's license and no life, I'd probably try to imitate his Cinematographic, Scientific and Literary genius, not to mention his wonderful computer skills.