Hugh
Member
Last week I picked up the mass market paperback version of Danielle Steel's book "A Good Woman". It was the first fiction book I had picked up in about twenty years. It reminded me about the real reasons I stay in the non-fiction section of book stores. Somewhere along the line I had started kidding myself that I stuck to non-fiction because fiction was a waste of time. I told myself that I could not possibly invest the time needed to read a book if I did not learn something from it. It was a pompous attitude and worse than that, it wasn't true. The real reason, as I re-discovered this week, is the emotional toll it takes on me. Today I finshed the last 1/4 of the book and I probably went through a whole box of kleenex. I went out to the cocktail lounge to support my friend who has a gig there, (it's a weeknight and there is never a large crowd there, so I make it a point to be there and patronize the lounge), but I had to leave early as I didn't want my depressed mood to spread like a virus to the others who had come for a good time. I had spent most of the afternoon sobbing prior to going out, and no matter how many drinks I had it was not going to cheer me up, I was only becoming more depressed.
It's the same reason I don't watch movies. Even though I tell myself that I can not allow myself to waste time sitting in a movie theater, the real reason is that I become too drawn in to the story, too sympathetic to the characters. The only movie I've seen since I was a child was the movie Brokeback Mountain. It hit so close to home for me, it was so sad, that I was in a depressed state for many days afterward.
Anyway, I'll start another book tommorrow, I may even buy a new one. I saw a book about a drag queen's diary in a window during my walk home from the cocktail lounge. Or maybe I'll re-read another one of the great stock market books I already have.
But no more goddam fiction. I'm not strong enough for it.
It's the same reason I don't watch movies. Even though I tell myself that I can not allow myself to waste time sitting in a movie theater, the real reason is that I become too drawn in to the story, too sympathetic to the characters. The only movie I've seen since I was a child was the movie Brokeback Mountain. It hit so close to home for me, it was so sad, that I was in a depressed state for many days afterward.
Anyway, I'll start another book tommorrow, I may even buy a new one. I saw a book about a drag queen's diary in a window during my walk home from the cocktail lounge. Or maybe I'll re-read another one of the great stock market books I already have.
But no more goddam fiction. I'm not strong enough for it.