warm_enema
New Member
How many of those little birthday candles will fit into a human rectum before it explodes?
-
Welcome
to BookAndReader! We LOVE books and hope you'll join us in sharing your favorites and experiences along with your love of reading with our community. Registering for our site is free and easy, just CLICK HERE!
Already a member and forgot your password? Click here.
Ask Me Anything ...
- Thread starter Martin
- Start date
- Status
Ok, I am keeping this thread alive 
Ahem... MEMEMEMEMEMEME
Martin! Imagine, if you will... You are in the wilderness. You have had an accident! There has been a rock fall! Your leg is trapped. OH NO!! Your car is only a few yards away BUT, as I said, your leg is trapped under that huge rock. Night is falling and will soon be -20. You know you will NOT survive the night. Lucky you! You have a survival knife on you! Your ONLY chance is to saw though your own leg with a survival knife!
So, Martin, my question is this: How long would it take a average man to saw though his own leg with a survival knife?
( NOTE: This was based on a real event that was on T.V recently! )
Regards
SillyWabbit
PS: Difficult one, huh?
PPS: Too much Pee Pee!
PPPS: I can't stop with the Pee Pee Pee
PPPS: Must... stop... now......
PPPPS: ... CAN'T
Ahem... MEMEMEMEMEMEME
Martin! Imagine, if you will... You are in the wilderness. You have had an accident! There has been a rock fall! Your leg is trapped. OH NO!! Your car is only a few yards away BUT, as I said, your leg is trapped under that huge rock. Night is falling and will soon be -20. You know you will NOT survive the night. Lucky you! You have a survival knife on you! Your ONLY chance is to saw though your own leg with a survival knife!
So, Martin, my question is this: How long would it take a average man to saw though his own leg with a survival knife?
( NOTE: This was based on a real event that was on T.V recently! )
Regards
SillyWabbit
PS: Difficult one, huh?
PPS: Too much Pee Pee!
PPPS: I can't stop with the Pee Pee Pee
PPPS: Must... stop... now......
PPPPS: ... CAN'T
warm_enema
New Member
Litany, how do you know this? I really think it is more than that.
Martin
Active Member
Truckloads, I tell 'ya!
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Phil:
Who invented Spam, the 'foodstuff'?
I've know idea who invented spam, but God bless 'em, for how else could I
survive without my favourite meal: spam,spam,spam, spam, eggs and spam. (dont always have the eggs, though).
No, seriously, I believe it was a company by the name of Hormel Foods, based in Austin. Look here for a Spam family tree (or should that be Spamily tree?).
Why is the Dutch football team so rubbish now?
Because they stink.
How the hell do you keep a Tamigotchi alive?
Ignore it as best you can.
Where the hell is Martin?
*points to self*
Right here, bubba.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Litany:
How big a lump of DNA would you get if you extracted all the DNA out of one human body? Say, a 5'8'' man of average build.
I could only find the amout of DNA of a slighly overweight man who is 5'7" tall. Will that do?
That man (let's call him Phillip) has about 9 million kilometres of DNA. That's enough to reach to the moon and back 13 times!
I would prefer it in terms of balls used in sport. i.e., football, tennis, ball, snooker ball, etc.
One DNA molecule weighs about 0.00094 g. You figure out the rest.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Wabbit:
How long would it take a average man to saw though his own leg with a survival knife?
I don't know, I'd passed out before reaching the end.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
RaVeN:
How many book pages have you read?
You know I actually thought about this some time ago. I honestly do not know, because I've read so many books which were borrowed, or which I gave away, or which were lost. Plus, I've read many many books for school, which I haven't kept track of. If that wasn't the case I could just add it all up. But, alas, that is the case. So, I don't know. Do you?
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Riiiiight.
NEXT!
Cheers, Martin
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Phil:
Who invented Spam, the 'foodstuff'?
I've know idea who invented spam, but God bless 'em, for how else could I
survive without my favourite meal: spam,spam,spam, spam, eggs and spam. (dont always have the eggs, though).
No, seriously, I believe it was a company by the name of Hormel Foods, based in Austin. Look here for a Spam family tree (or should that be Spamily tree?).
Why is the Dutch football team so rubbish now?
Because they stink.
How the hell do you keep a Tamigotchi alive?
Ignore it as best you can.
Where the hell is Martin?
*points to self*
Right here, bubba.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Litany:
How big a lump of DNA would you get if you extracted all the DNA out of one human body? Say, a 5'8'' man of average build.
I could only find the amout of DNA of a slighly overweight man who is 5'7" tall. Will that do?
That man (let's call him Phillip) has about 9 million kilometres of DNA. That's enough to reach to the moon and back 13 times!
I would prefer it in terms of balls used in sport. i.e., football, tennis, ball, snooker ball, etc.
One DNA molecule weighs about 0.00094 g. You figure out the rest.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Wabbit:
How long would it take a average man to saw though his own leg with a survival knife?
I don't know, I'd passed out before reaching the end.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
RaVeN:
How many book pages have you read?
You know I actually thought about this some time ago. I honestly do not know, because I've read so many books which were borrowed, or which I gave away, or which were lost. Plus, I've read many many books for school, which I haven't kept track of. If that wasn't the case I could just add it all up. But, alas, that is the case. So, I don't know. Do you?
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
Riiiiight.
NEXT!
Cheers, Martin
RaVeN
New Member
First off, where did you get the picture of Mile-O? .... Chill out Jell-o, I'm just kidding.
As for the amount of pages I've read, i've tried not to think about it too much for fear of brain freeze. I'm afraid i'm going to have a weekend of solitude (and a few grains of hash) before I even consider thinking about it. One of these days though.....
RaVeN
.... Chill out Jell-o, I'm just kidding.As for the amount of pages I've read, i've tried not to think about it too much for fear of brain freeze. I'm afraid i'm going to have a weekend of solitude (and a few grains of hash) before I even consider thinking about it. One of these days though.....
RaVeN
Litany
Active Member
warm_enema said:
Because I did it, of course. I would never post the answer to such a question unless I was 100% certain of the answer, and I am. Last year, myself, and many others, conducted a fully controlled experiment into bottoms, candles and combustion. We had a full range of bottom sizes and even the most giftest anus could take no more than twelve candles before errupting into such a conflagration as would scare your granny. In fact, it was only Big Bob McGinty who could even manage that many and he'd been practicing all week with carrots. The actual science behind the phenomenon, for anyone who's interested, is actually quite simple.
The insertion of candles into the rectum causes an obvious increase in size of the hole. Now, as more candles are inserted, the hole increases in diameter, but does not form a perfect seal around the candles, allowing flammable gases to escape. As the gap increases, so does the release of gas until a point is reached where so much gas is escaping that spontaneous combustion is an inescapable conclusion.
Of course, were you just to insert one large candle there would be a perfect seal and no gas would escape, meaning that one could insert something with a far greater diameter than when inserting numerous smaller objects. This is probably what causes your surprise at the maximum number of insertable candles being so low. The key factor here is the candle:gap ratio.
If you want to read further then all the results were published in various journals, all of which should be easy to locate with a simple PubMed search.
Litany
Active Member
If you're interested in pushing back the frontiers of knowledge, we're testing how many Maltesers you can force up your nose before your brain turns brown. Everyone's welcome. Tomorrow lunchtime at Guildford Cathedral. Bring your own Maltesers.phil_t said:Litany, i see the swinging Surrey scene is still as OBscene as ever
- Status