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Bad song lyrics.

Crank Dat Soulja Boy has to be the most pointless song in existance.

"You catch me at yo local party,
yes I crank it everyday.
Haterz get mad coz,
I got me some bathing apes"

Come again? :confused:
 
tears of life said:
Crank Dat Soulja Boy has to be the most pointless song in existance.

"You catch me at yo local party,
yes I crank it everyday.
Haterz get mad coz,
I got me some bathing apes"

Come again? :confused:
Click to expand...

Bathing Apes refers to A Bathing Ape (or BAPE), a Japanese clothing company that makes some of the ugliest stuff I have ever seen.

astylegrounds.com_images_bape_multicolor_white.jpg
 
On Jimmy Fallon recently they goofed on a song called "Do You Have a Garter Belt?", catchy until they get to the chorus
 
I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH!
I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH!
I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH!
I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH!
..and so on into infinity. You're lucky your dad's rich, Willow.


I actually kind of like this song but that second verse is such a mess. It doesn't even scan.
 
tears of life said:
Crank Dat Soulja Boy has to be the most pointless song in existance.

"You catch me at yo local party,
yes I crank it everyday.
Haterz get mad coz,
I got me some bathing apes"

Come again? :confused:
Click to expand...

Awww nobody can look at that granny getting down and not laugh...
I nominate Nick Lowe's "Marie Provost"..."She was a winner, who became her doggies dinner". Based on an actual silent screen actress who was snacked on by her dachshund. It's actually quite a bouncy tune.
 
The worst song lyric of all time was written by Ozzy Osbourn [who else]
"Generals gather in their masses,
Just like witches at black masses,
did you see what he did there?
 
Over the weekend I watched the M*A*S*H movie (I had forgotten how brilliant that movie is). I went online to find the guitar sheets for the theme (because catchy) and found this interesting tidbit:

The song was written specifically for Ken Prymus (the actor playing Private Seidman), who sang it during the faux suicide of Walter Waldowski (John Schuck) in the film's "Last Supper" scene. Robert Altman had two stipulations about the song for Mandel; first, it had to be called "Suicide Is Painless", secondly, it had to be the "stupidest song ever written". Altman tried to write the lyrics himself, but found that it was too difficult for his 45-year-old brain to write "stupid enough". Instead he gave the task to his 14-year-old-son, Michael, who apparently wrote the lyrics in five minutes.
Click to expand...

Now, I don't the lyrics are that stupid. Well, maybe the refrain.


Through early morning fog I see
Visions of the things to be
The pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

I try to find a way to make
All our little joys relate
Without that ever-present hate
But now I know that it's too late, and

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
The losing card I'll someday lay
So this is all I have to say

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

The only way to win is cheat
And lay it down before I'm beat
And to another give my seat
For that's the only painless feat

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger watch it grin, but

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

A brave man once requested me
To answer questions that are key
Is it to be or not to be
And I replied 'Oh, why ask me?'

That suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

'Cause suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

And you can do the same thing if you please
Click to expand...
 
Here's Candy by Robbie Williams, utterly incomprehensible.

I was there to witness
Candice's into business
She wants the boys to notice
Her rainbows and her ponies
She was educated
But could not count to ten
How she got lots of different horses
By lots of different men
And I say

Liberate your sons and daughters
The bush is high
But in the hole there's water
You can get some, when they give it
Nothing's sacred, but it's a livin

Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too high or a little too low
Got no self esteem and vertigo
Cause she thinks she's made of candy
Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too loud or a little too close
Got hurricane in the back of her throat
She thinks she's made of candy

Ring a ring of roses
Whoever gets the closest
She comes and she goes
As the war of the roses
Mother was a victim
Father beat the system
By moving bricks to Brixton
And learning how to fix them

Liberate your sons and daughters
The bush is high
But in the hole there's water
As you will
She'll be the Hollywood love
And if it don't feel good
What are you doing it for
Now tell me

Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too high or a little too low
Got no self esteem and vertigo
Cause she thinks she's made of candy
Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too loud or a little too close
Got a hurricane in the back of her throat
She thinks she's made of candy

Liberate your sons and daughters
The bush is high
But in the hole there's water
As you will
She'll be the Hollywood love
And if it don't feel good
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for
What are you doing it for

Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too high or a little too low
Got no self esteem and vertigo
Cause she thinks she's made of candy
Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too loud or a little too close
Got a hurricane in the back of her throat
She thinks she's made of candy

Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too high or a little too low
Got no self esteem and vertigo
Cause she thinks she's made of candy
Hey ho here she goes
Either a little too loud or a little too close
Got a hurricane in the back of her throat
She thinks she's made of candy
 
Whenever I try to find a "deeper" meaning to that , I can't think of anything that's not, well, a bit dirty.
 
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